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How can you weaken the grip a specific fear has on you?
How do you feel when you believe you have overcome a fear and then it crops back up? Is it a good thing or a bad thing for a fear that is apparently gone to become visible again? What good can come of having a fear that goes through cycles of being visible and then being hidden? Is there a hidden benefit you get from fighting one of your fears?
As you go through the process of beating your fear demons, one of the things you will be doing is building up your strength against specific fears. There is a cycle that happens before you overcome fear when you continue to do something you are afraid of. Each time you do what you are afraid of, you will feel your fear getting less and less. You will feel the grip that fear has on you weaken. Then, out of the blue, you will feel the fear be almost as strong as when you originally started battling it. When that happens, I invite you to look at it as a good thing.
It is a good thing because it means you are building up your strength to fight the fear. It is also a good thing because the grip the fear has on you is weaker. This is evident by the fear not being as strong as it once was. It is a good thing because it means your mind is testing you to see how far you have come in battling your fear. Your mind can use that knowledge to help you find additional ways to battle the fear. It is also a good thing because it means you are not blind to the fear. There are some fears that would lead us into a world of hurt if we were completely blind to. For example, fear of heights can be useful if the thing you are being asked to climb is unsafe for climbing.
How this applies to authentic empathy…
When it comes to authentic empathy and building up strength to battle one of your fear demons, because it is a cycle and because it is a process, the more authentic empathy you have for yourself and the more authentic empathy you have from others, the quicker you will succeed. When you go through the cycle and a fear you thought was gone rears its ugly head, I invite you to give yourself a high level of authentic empathy. I invite you to accept that it is all part of the process. I invite you to take the fact that you can overcome that fear quicker as a win and something to be applauded. Then, keep working on beating the fear. When it comes to the people around you, I invite you to explain this process to them and ask for their authentic empathy. They will need to understand that you may fall down a few times until you beat your fear demon once and for all.
How this applies to WACASHWI…
When it comes to WACASHWI and building up the strength to battle one of your fear demons, when you put a task on your list to overcome a specific fear, I invite you to consider if a more achievable short-term task would be to build up the strength to battle that fear. When coming up with the strength to battle a fear will take two weeks and overcoming that fear fully will take two years, putting a task on your list to work on the strength you need to battle the fear will give you a bigger, immediate benefit above what is obvious. The hidden benefit is that the strength you develop to battle one fear will be useful when battling another fear.
Your daily invitations…
- I invite you to think about a time when you thought a fear was gone and it came back.
- I invite you to consider something you could have learned from that experience.
- I invite you to write down your thoughts, feelings, and actions in your journal.
- I invite you to talk about your fear with someone close to you so they can support you when the fear crops back up.
- I invite you to work with a good coach, mentor, or therapist for additional support when the fear crops up and to handle any negative feeling you experience while working through this process.
Final step – how will you implement one thing you learned today in your life?