Big Fears and Anger
Estimated Reading Time: 7 Minutes
Do big fears manifest themselves as anger in you?
How would your feelings change towards someone if you knew that their anger came from a place of fear? How would your opinion of yourself change if you knew your anger came from a place of fear? How would your life change for the better if you could eliminate a major source of your anger? How would people around you treat you differently if they knew you were afraid and not angry?
Large fears can have a serious negative impact on our lives. Being afraid of losing your job, losing your house, losing your significant other, not being able to put food on the table, not seeing loved ones again and so many more things are large fears. Today, how do you handle large fears to prevent them from boiling over into anger and frustration? Do you push them aside? Do you confront them head-on?
There is an old saying, “When the evil in your mind is too strong, the only way to win is to deny it battle.” When it comes to fear, many of us feel the same way. We feel the only way to beat a fear is to deny it battle. When denying it battle also means we do not feel the effect of the fear, this strategy can be useful. On the other hand, denying a fear and still feeling its effects, especially when we do not realize how the fear is affecting us, is a recipe for disaster.
If you experience a large or significant fear, the first thing I invite you to do is to focus. Focus on one thing. Focus on the first obvious step you can take to overcome that fear. Focus on something you can control. Take care of that one thing and start to remove the bricks of fear one brick at a time. It will not happen overnight. The good news is that, just like fear can build up over time, you can take a big fear and break it down over time.
Perseverance is the key to beating a big fear demon one small battle at a time.
How this applies to authentic empathy…
When it comes to authentic empathy and handling large fears, the amount of authentic empathy you have for others and the amount of authentic empathy they have for you will determine if your friendships or relationships survive. If people around you have confronted the same big fear as you and they have been successful in beating that fear, they have it in them to give you the authentic empathy you need to get through. Because they do not want to feel the pain that the fear caused them, they will struggle to give you the authentic empathy you need at first. When that happens, I invite you to show them a high level of authentic empathy and understand they are doing what they are doing out of self-preservation. I invite you to talk with them. I invite you to show your authentic empathy for them. When you show an increased level of authentic empathy for them, they will feel safe in showing an increased level of authentic empathy for you.
How this applies to WACASHWI…
When it comes to WACASHWI and handling large fears, when you begin to work on handling a large fear, I invite you to use the questions in the WACASHWI method to focus on what you can control and will do next. Ask yourself, what do you Want to control, accomplish, or focus on? What Can you control, accomplish, or focus on? What Should you control, accomplish, or focus on? And then what Will you control, accomplish, or focus on.? Once you have done that, start moving forward on one of the things you decided you will control, accomplish, or focus on.
Your daily invitations…
- I invite you to think about the most recent large fear you experienced.
- I invite you to consider who has been affected by that fear and what is in your control that you can use to alleviate that large fear.
- I invite you to write down your thoughts, feelings, and actions in your journal.
- I invite you to talk about your fear with the person you considered above if it is safe to do so.
- I invite you, today, if you are afraid of something or if you are afraid of someone, start to work through your fears. Read, watch videos, do research, and do what is necessary to work through your fears. Reach out to a professional for help. There are good coaches, mentors, and therapists ready to help and ready to see you succeed.
Final step – how will you implement one thing you learned today in your life?
This all is but one step in your journey to living a more stress-free life, beating the demons of fear, and raising your level of authentic empathy towards yourself and others.